The Starling Fallacy: 36 pages of redemption
It seems to be the season to release great fantasy books about your brand. Here is the latest addition to the bike library, from Starling Cycles:
Born from the depths of the NSMB forum, the Starling Fallacy is Starling’s deepest and darkest secret.
He lurked on the prowl, exposing the heart of the mark’s being; its modus operandi; his original sin. But like all secrets, it would never rest, never die, never cease. He would still be there, in the shadows, threatening the heart of Starling Cycles.
And so, Starling Cycles founder Joe McEwan decided enough was enough. Like all good internet conspiracies, he knew the fallacy was grounded in truth. And so, it’s time to tell the truth.
The game is over. Starling is no more. The steel and single pivot are actually not real.
“The Starling Fallacy argues that somehow great geometry and hangar manufacturing can overcome the performance issues of a true single-pivot bike. And, since we know that great geometry is free and easily duplicated, we can further reduce the error by saying that crafting sheds alone can solve said problems.
You don’t even have to produce all of your bikes in the shed – just some of them. And so, riders who would absolutely not accept the performance of a simple no-linkage true united pivot design from a major manufacturer or even a smaller manufacturer will rejoice in the descending prowess of a Starling.
The Starling Fallacy – Available to Order Now
To mark the final chapter of Starling Cycles, McEwan decided to lift the veil on the brand with a limited edition 36-page, coffee-table quality hardcover journal titled “Starling Fallacy”. Intended partly as memoirs and partly as a confession, the book will give McEwan an opportunity for self-revelation and, he hopes, redemption.
“Being Honest” says McEwan in the opening chapter titled “Got Fired?” Fire Up The Welder’ “I just needed a job after I got fired from my aerospace job.”
“I had ridden mountain bikes a few times, so I thought I’d give it a shot. I wasn’t sure how to make money out of it, but I knew it would come quite easily”.
Joe admits he quickly spotted a gap in the market: “There were frame builders everywhere and it seemed pretty easy. You just need to copy some geometry from another brand and make it a bit longer, lower and looser. Then you glue some tubes together and Bob is your uncle.
Joe’s enthusiasm was not dampened by a lack of resources and, he admits, inspiration was drawn from the world around him. “I only had the shed to work in because my wife wouldn’t let me weld in the house, so I worked in there. I bought a welder on eBay and prayed it wouldn’t blow up the garden. And yes, I needed a name for the “brand” and was in a hurry to go to the pub on a Friday, so I just picked the first thing I spotted out the window, a starling on the garden fence. Nailed it.”
Joe soon realized that his new brand had exposed something bigger. “Honestly, they couldn’t get enough. It was like people saw the shed, saw how basic the bikes were, and were willing to pay double what they would for a good bike. It was crazy. I raised the price after I built a couple and the money came in.
My first million.
The frame design was obviously critical and the book chapter titled ‘Mo Pivots, Mo Problems. One Pivot, Mo Money’ carries it all.
“Kinematics? No idea. Basically I just looked at a bunch of old bikes online and copied them. People seemed to like the idea of a bike with brake jack loads, shock bushings disposables and a suspension that didn’t work when you pulled the plugs in. It felt like the more basic you did it the more they wanted to convince themselves it would work.
“Once I made the suspension as low-tech as possible, I had one final brainwave: ‘What if we made it with the oldest, heaviest, thinnest, easiest break possible?’ Steel was the obvious choice. The internet went crazy and I made my first million.”
McEwan, currently based in the Bahamas, hopes that by sharing his story, riders will see the true value of simple, single-pivot steel bikes and continue to believe the hype.
After sales of the limited-edition print newspaper “The Starling Fallacy” are complete, he intends to sell the company to a major bicycle manufacturer.
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